There's no wire actually connecting one stage to the next, ant the second stages cathode resistor is removed,... BUT...when I play through it I can hear it through the speakers. Somehow the first tube is "talking" to the 3rd(layout,capacitance,whatever).
What I want to know before I rip anything else out is:
Seeing as if I turn the pot down it kills the sound, somehow my problem the grid is picking up signal from the 1st tube. I'm just trying to eliminate the possiblity the the plate or cathode is picking up signal.
If turning that pot down kills the sound it must be the grid picking up signal, right?
Good chance that you're on the right track. A picture might be worth 10,000 words in this case, because you might not know "what right looks like." (to borrow a military phrase)
So here's what's not likely:
Coupling through a shared cathode resistor is somewhat unlikely, because the resistance is too small. Think about a long-tail inverter; there is some amount of cathode coupling, because the shared cathode resistance is relatively large. If you have a resistor on the order of 1k instead of 100k, cathode coupling is reduced 100 times.
It is possible to have cross-talk with a tube. It's not clear from what you've described so far if the triodes in question are inside the same envelope.
Also, along the same lines as the cathode-coupling example, but opposite, a high impedance point is susceptible to picking up stray signals. So a 1M resistor will translate a small stray current into a voltage 1,000 times bigger than a 1k resistor. So if you have wiring for a large signal (typically phase inverter output) pass near a 1M resistor or pot (or wires leading to them), you create good conditions for the 1M to develop a stray signal voltage.
A common high-resistance ground could cause some strange problems. The cathode of a triode has a low input impedance, but it also has a larger gain than the grid input. If there is a shared ground path that is poor quality (appreciably bigger than 0Ω), it is conceivable that the input signal develops a small voltage across the poor ground which serves to inject a signal into the cathode of a later stage. However, hum usually results from this cause, as power supply current are likely to be much bigger than signal currents.
A way too small decoupling resistor between filter caps may allow signal to bleed from one supply node to the next through the power supply. However, low-frequency oscillation (0-to-several Hz, or motorboating) is more often the result as higher frequency signals like audio are typically shunted to ground by the filter caps (unless they are toast).
So aside from poor solder joints, or a wire soldered in the wrong place, the most likely cause is the plate output of one stage passing too close to the grid wiring of the later stage. This is especially true if the wires are parallel to each other, as that maximizes inductive coupling.